The human mind is wired to notice change, not permanence. What is always present, reliable, and unchanging often disappears from conscious awareness. Just as we forget about air until we struggle to breathe, a mother’s steady love can go unnoticed precisely because it never fails.

In this way, a mother becomes part of the background—indispensable, yet unseen. Not because she lacks importance, but because her presence feels guaranteed. This unconscious neurological pattern can leave the one who gives endlessly feeling deeply undervalued.

2. The distance required to become oneself

Psychological growth requires separation. For a child to develop their own identity, they must question, disagree, and create emotional distance from their parents—a process known as individuation.

What feels like self-discovery to a child often feels like rejection to a mother. Yet in many cases, love has not diminished; the child is simply trying to define who they are. When this separation is met with guilt or resistance, the distance often grows even wider.

3. Pain released where safety is guaranteed

Children frequently unload their frustration, anger, or inner chaos onto the person they trust will never leave. Because a mother represents unconditional acceptance, she becomes the safest place to release emotions they cannot manage elsewhere. Continue reading…